Perhaps you have heard the term “agree to disagree.” For those who may not know it simply means that since neither one of us is going to change our view and/or opinion, rather than going around in circles, we simply agree to disagree. Doing this allows us to move forward in our relationship; whatever it may be, friends, family, co-workers, without hurt feelings and yet understanding where the other person is coming from.
It seems to me that this is a term that not only needs to be reintroduced into our society but practiced as well. I have been a witness to many “discussions” that end up in name calling and the “resolution” of ‘if you don’t agree with me, we can’t be friends’ or ‘we can’t be in each other’s lives.’ How petty and childish is that? You are willing to give up on a family and friends because you don’t agree on a topic?
Diversity is what makes the world an interesting place. If we all agreed on everything then we might as well not have the ability to think and discover for ourselves. When did we go from polite, thoughtful discussions to angry, name calling, tantrums and arguments? Did you know that just because you call someone a name you do not “win” the conversation? You do not “influence” them to your way of thinking? What you are really doing is dis-respecting their belief system and acting like a toddler who isn’t getting their way. Perhaps, when you were a toddler, your parent(s) gave in to your actions and you have grown up to believe that this is the ‘way things are done’ in the world. Well, as much as I hate to be the bearer of bad news; it’s not.
As a matter of fact, most people in society won’t tolerate this behavior. If you aren’t careful, you might find yourself on the other side of someone with their own rage issues.
Debating is a healthy way of learning someone else’s opinion while sharing your own. In the end, you don’t have to agree with what the other person has said. You don’t have to change your own view or opinion. You will learn something about where they are coming from and why. If you are willing to open your mind to the possibility that other opinions exist beyond your own and/or those of the ‘like-minded’ people you hang around; you will expand your knowledge base. Isn’t that what we should be doing? Keep an open mind and be willing to change our views if presented with information that does challenge our thinking? Changing your mind does not make you weak. Just as maintaining your opinion doesn’t necessarily make you right.
There is so much being spread about ‘hate’ of this or that. When are we going to start spreading tolerance? Tolerance is not built by name-calling. It is not built by yelling or screaming. It is something that is shown, not only by our words, but our actions. If you want to build a foundation of any kind, then you need to start with your own actions.
Speaking directly to those who profess a religious belief: if your actions and words are spiteful and angry, if you are name-calling to “prove” you are right, what kind of representation are you showing? Is it any wonder that so many religions leave a bad taste in people’s mouths? No one can see your light if all you are doing is spewing out hate at others for what they believe. Think about it.